Doug’s Birthday

5 Feb

A tired and nervous new mommy and Doug.

Today is my son’s birthday which, of course, takes me back to the first time I saw him, the first time I held him, and the love that instantly began to flow through me toward him.

I’m thinking today about the hopes and dreams we have for our children.  And the fears we have for them.  I remember talking with my mother-in-law about this during a particularly tumultuous time during my sons’ teenage years.  I asked her how she managed her fear, because she has 17 children.  She looked at me with what I swear was confusion on her face and said, “Sue, I gave them to God when they were born.  Why would I be afraid?”

For her it was a done deal.  For me?  I keep giving and taking and giving and taking.  What about you?

When I get really afraid
I come to you in trust.
I’m proud to praise God;
fearless now, I trust in God.
What can mere mortals do?

Psalm 56:3,4 The Message

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4 Responses to “Doug’s Birthday”

  1. kate February 5, 2011 at 11:28 am #

    I love you. This post made me cry. Trusting that God will provide for you, His beloved. (and mine.)

  2. susanjean February 5, 2011 at 11:29 am #

    I love you more!! Grappling with hope today.

    • kate February 5, 2011 at 11:34 am #

      I know you are, I am too. My heart is broken for you. All I can hold on to is God’s continued provision… who would of thought that the Aunt who used to slam doors during Mom’s bible study would now be a missionary in Ecuador?

  3. susanjean February 5, 2011 at 12:09 pm #

    Who says God doesn’t have a sense of humor?!

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